That time of year....

It's getting to be that time of year again. When my thoughts drift to Danica more and more. Her birthday is coming up next month. Hard be to believe that she would have been 4 this year. I know our lives would be so different than what it is now had she survived.

I was going through my photobucket account and found some of my favorite pics of her.

Both eyes open for the first time.

First time I saw her cry.

First smile.

My absolute favorite pic of her.

She already had Daddy wrapped around her tiny fingers. <3

And then the scrap pages that were made by a friend after we lost her. 

And one that I made. 

Danica Jeane Dybis
05/20/07~07/07/07
When you went Home to God
You took a piece of my soul with you.
We love and miss you sweet pea!!!!

7 years ago

7 years ago I was sitting in the pediatric ward at Balboa. Gabe had been admitted following his CT scan because his blood pressure was through the roof. Both Savannah (age 4) and Gabe (age 2) were very antsy because they hadn't been able to play all day. I was on my own with these 2 and 5 months preg with Chris. Walter was on deployment and in a port visit in Sasebo. I knew that they had found a tumor on his left kidney at this point and that was what was messing with his blood pressure. My online friends were my saving grace till Walter got home. We hadn't lived in San Diego long, so I didn't have too many friends. And family (both sides) were half a country away. Women that I had never met, would call and check in on me, let me vent, cry, etc. They wouldn't know me from Jane on the street, but they were there for me. Thank you guys!

The next morning, 4/1/04 at 5am, I would meet Dr Lande (oncologist) and Dr Vasquez (peds surgeon) for the first time. It would be the first time that I heard the words cancer and Gabe in the same sentence. At this point, no one knew what type it was. We wouldn't know till after the biopsy which was scheduled for 3 days later. What they did know was that his left kidney was completely encased in tumor, there was a tumor thrombus that had snaked down his renal vein and was halfway up his IVC to heart and that his lungs were covered in tumors. 

We would eventually find out that he was stage IV with wilm's. He would then do 24 weeks of chemo (3 different chemo meds), 8 days of radiation and 4 surgeries (1 of which we almost lost him). It's been a long road since then, but as I watch him face what life has in store for him, I am amazed at how he handles everything. Sometimes it feels like yesterday since all this happened and others it feels like it's been a lifetime. He doesnt remember too much of that time. Other than that "he should be scared of dr's", but he is slowly overcoming that with good checkups and child life specialists that help him through everything. I so wish that program had existed when he was going through actual treatment.

9 days after surgery to remove his kidney/tumor. Day 1 of radiation. 7th week of chemo.

Gabe 2nd grade spring pic

But the point of this post...... WOW! Its been 7 years!!!!

Enjoying life

Things have been going good. So far all of Gabe's appts have ended with good results. He has his follow up for the brain/spine MRI on Monday. Then we see the GI dr on Wed. Then only one more appt left for him to do and that is the beginning of April to see Nuerology about his headaches.

FRG is going good. I have stepped up the President position and am finally get the rest of the board positions filled in. We have so many plans that we want to do and are getting the approval from the command to do them, YAY!

Underways are back in full swing again. But I cant complain too much since we got confirmation yesterday that we will be PCS'ing at the end of summer. Which means we will get through 3 years of sea duty without a deployment. :o)

So far, so good...

Finally got Gabe's lab work back. Everything came back normal! WOO HOO!!!! 6.5 years in remission! Oncologist wants him to see neurology for the "headaches" he has. He is thinking that they are treatment induced migraines. So I have to call tomorrow to make that appt. The neurosurgeon wants him to do the MRI of his brain and spine to see how things are. She wants to be sure that his "headaches" aren't being caused by the Chiari. So, have to call and schedule that tomorrow as well. Dentist went good! No cavities and it a piece of a baby tooth that is still hanging out in his gums. So unless it falls out on it's own in the next month, he will go back and get it pulled. Cardiology next week and GI the week after that, plus the neurology, MRI and then follow up to the MRI.

Doc wants hubby to see ortho for his back, so need to call and get that scheduled on Monday. He took the E6 exam today. Hopefully, fingers and toes crossed, that he has enough points to get him over the lack of PNA and time in rank points to push him over and pick it up.

Dinner tonight for FRG stuff and for me to relax a bit. Cant wait! I am ready for life to slow back down again.

Finally some down time

So, hubs is finally healthy enough to be back at work. I am still not sure how I made it through Jan with my sanity still intact. The countdown is officially on to saying good riddance to sea duty. 7 months to go and then back down to the gulf coast we go. Cant wait to be closer to home again. WOO HOO!

Productive morning.....

I hit the commissary this morning. Need to head to the NEX to get W some new sheets for his rack on the ship. Got Gabe's appt set up so I can get the 7 referrals and tests put in so that I can schedule those. Got Savannah's follow up appt made. Called housing down in Panama City to see how that is going to work out. I really need to get my nails filled. But I dont want to go back out. Its too flipping cold for my taste. LOL 

I think I have had a pretty productive morning! Let's see if I can keep that up for the rest of the day. Still have way to much to do.

Going to attempt this again.....

Life has been crazy for me for the past 7 years. It's gotten even more so since I started working last summer. Gabe will be having his checkups soon and it's looking like W may not be home for them. So, this will be my outlet for my crazy life in an attempt to keep my sanity!